Easy run

Did a very easy run today, more of a "wog", just a couple of miles. I'm trying to decide if I'm going to turn the 10K in November into a 5K just to give me time to deal with all the new news. Some more lab results came in - I'm awesome in the electrolyte and thyroid departments, but definitely anemic. However, just because I have to go easy, doesn't mean stopping. The low heart rate and the anemia is slowing me down, but I'll just enjoy being slow. It's still moving forward, and that's always a good direction!

Lupus

I'm so laughing! My doc thinks I might have lupus, and yea, it kind of fits with all my other autoimmune illnesses, but so what? I'm going to be an even slower turtle of a runner now? You know, once you've become proud of being a turtle runner, you can still smile as long as you're jogging. I'll be the wise little turtle at the back of the pack - happy as a lark and with the heart of a cheetah!

That said, I really need to get back into practice. I've been letting these doc reports mess with my head and I haven't been running that much...and I have a 10K in November! So, back to work girlie, go put those running shoes to use!

Avoiding the inevitable

Sometimes I feel like I'm avoiding the inevitable end to all these fun challenges, that one day the doctors are going to tell me to quit. Until then, I'm going to keep going forward. My symptoms are getting worse, resting heart rate is going into the thirties now, more dehydration, fatigue, asthma, muscle spasms, pain and now facial rashes when I work out. But you know...for all the nasty after effects, the only time I truly feel healthy is when I'm running, in the gym or in a karate class. It's as if time stops for just a little while, everything is flowing and even if I'm going at a turtle pace, I feel like a little cheetah. If the doctors ever tell me to stop, I'll probably ignore them. I like to know the different diagnoses, to know what to work around, but management is something I want to control. If life is going to be shorter because of all of this, then it's going to stay happy...and happy is running.

Tired, but it's working

I decided that I really needed to recommit to getting off of insulin - I came so close before! Sooo...today I've been working off my food with running and walking. So far, so good. I haven't had to take any short acting insulin, only the long acting this morning. Which is very cool, that's six units down if I don't take tonight's dose, either. Group class tonight should help keep me active enough so that I don't need to take insulin, but if not, I can always throw in 20 minutes on the treadmill.

Have to say, this is not going to be easy. Already I'm exhausted and fighting off the fibromyalgia and weariness. However, that's how it all started before when I reduced my insulin by 70% the first time - no pain, no gain. I have to give it another try to finish it off.

The thing is, it's not just about the workouts, I already do those. It's about the timing, that's the tricky part. However, if I do something cardio for 20-30 minutes within an hour of eating, that seems to be key. Just have to wait and see how this round goes.

For anyone who reads this, here's the website of my all time favorite diabetic athlete -he'd be awesome even without the diabetes, I WISH I had that kind of running endurance! If this guy can do so much, I can at least do my little part.
Running with Diabetes
http://runningwithdiabetes.com/

Ran just a bit

Ran just a bit this morning, a mile before the day's craziness, but I REALLY needed that mile. It was a crazy emotional day and, of course, that doesn't translate well with a nervous system disorder. Everything has worked out really well, but that doesn't change the aftermath. Blood pressure is up and down, heart rate is unpredictable, and I'm just DRAINED. Even though I'm good with it all, I'm a little down on myself for cancelling my private karate class tonight. It was just too much. I could have pushed and made it through...maybe. And maybe just wasn't good enough tonight. Tonight, I'm having a Merlot, listening to the Beatles and letting it go, because some days you just need to let go of the challenges.

This Week

This week I'm running, but kind of taking it easy. Yesterday I ran a couple of miles and then went to private class in Kenpo for an hour. Today I worked out at the gym, and took bo staff training for half an hour. It's keeping the blood flowing, but it's not really challenging. I'm in recovery mode because last week was kind of icky, so that's ok.

Interesting thing that I noticed, though, was yesterday I started to get sick...almost cancelled everything because it was the Great Question, "Will this make me worse?" Instead, I went ahead, ran, took class, and then started to get better almost immediately. So, sometimes all that exercise and blood flowing through the system actually helps instead of hurts.

Tomorrow is a run day, and then I need to pick at least two days out of Fri/Sat/Sun to run. Probably Sat/Sun because I'm back in the gym on Friday. I'm also going to try to run outside instead of staying "highly monitored" indoors on the treadmill. It's a little scarier that way, but I'm feeling good and I won't go too far. Training for anything more than a 10K is going to be nerve wracking. I really want to do a half marathon this year, but it just might have to wait until 2010. That's all right, I have a 10K coming up in November and that should be amazing fun!

This dysautonomia diagnosis is strange to me. It's new, and yet...not new. All it is, is a label on the symptoms I was having and a guide for researching to help make those symptoms better. That's how I should and usually do look at it. It's the part where they told me it's progressive that gives me pause. The doc said I have about five years before I'll definitely need a pacemaker, so I told her, well...guess I better run my marathon before then! It's going to be so hard to do, but won't it be cool if I can pull it off? OK, so thinking I could cram training in and do it this year was a little off. But maybe a half marathon next year and a marathon the year after that? It's already part of the plan! Of course, if I CAN do it sooner...Long Beach Marathon!!!

Updates

This has been a crazy year, but it's time to check in and record a bit of it before even MORE happens. Let's see...on the up side, I've run three 5K races (woohoo!), two of them with my son, and one of them was with my whole family. That one was the Salsa Dash in July. I've managed to get up to 6.2 miles running, but it had to be done on a treadmill. Aaaah, which brings me to the icky bits of this year.

I'm now a highly monitored person. I was diagnosed with a brain aneurysm, which caused a bit of a stir early on. There's a silver lining on that one, though. It's tiny and in the cavernous sinus region of my brain so that even if it does burst, the blood won't go into the gray matter of my brain (which could be lethal), but instead will go into my eyeball, which will cause it to bulge out. Uncomfortable and gross, but I will have time to get to a hospital before things go horribly wrong from there, so I was told not to worry about it. Lovely.

Then I continued to have problems with extraordinarily low heartrate and blood pressure, spending a great deal of quality time in hospitals. They finally came to the conclusion that I have dysautonomia and well...good luck with that. Seriously, there's no cure for it and if it degenerates things WILL go horribly wrong. Once again...lovely. AND my diabetes remains as brittle and unpredictable as ever. Yes...lovely.

Sometimes it really depresses me, sometimes it really excites me - I love a good challenge after all. And what an amazing disability to have...I HAVE to spend time in the gym, the dojo, running, or my body slows to a screeching halt or my blood sugars skyrocket. It would be idyllic except for the pain. Aaah, see...there had to be a catch. Because I still have fibromyalgia and neuropathy, the pain level increases while I'm taking care of the other problems. A wee bit of a Catch-22.

It's all very interesting. I'm reading medical journals I can barely understand, experimenting with myself to figure out exercise tolerance, and working on ways to keep me calm and balanced in body, mind and spirit so that my nervous system doesn't spaz out. It's fun in an exhausting kind of way, but it's really helping with setting an example for my son. I can't believe he views me as athletic now. Me - the bookworm! I never would have signed us up for 5Ks if this body meltdown hadn't happened so it's really a blessing in disguise because I get to teach my son good habits for his health as well.

And that's that. I haven't blogged about running, but I have been running...and sparring...and weight training. Hopefully, I'll be better at recording what going on from this point on. It's been and continues to be quite a journey.